Do You Want to be a Stay-At-Home Mom But Need a Job?

Womanhood, it’s a blessing, let’s embrace it. Let’s celebrate it. Let’s not apologize about it.

At some point in your life have you ever contemplated leaving your job or thought about what your options would be when you reach that crossroad? How would you handle it? I know if you’re anything like me, as a woman, you’ve thought in your earlier years… hmm what will my life be like when I have children? All of a sudden you begin to calculate that maternity leave…. suddenly it means something to you. What would I do with my three-month-old fresh out the belly baby? Daycare? Drop off to family or friends? No, I can’t do that. It’s my baby and my baby needs me. The overwhelming thoughts deter you from thinking further and you forget about it. Forget until it actually happens.

The crossroad is here. What do you do? The only clear, definitive answer you have is that your maximum maternity leave will be three months. Nice. Three whole months… That’s nothing. Then you become an expert on baby bonding because you’ve spent late nights researching how this could impact your baby. You learn that Europe and Canada provide women with a one-year maternity leave and dads too! This is unfair! Now your frustration turns to outrage. 

So, you quit your job because you can’t tolerate the thought of anyone else taking care of your brand-new baby. Not only that but you experience separation anxiety. Afterall, you just carried that precious baby for nine months; your strongest desire now is to bond with your baby. Why is this not the norm? Why are we approaching 2020 and still struggling to address such basic, impactful human needs?

I’ve always been a strong advocate of women empowerment and women in leadership. I’ve worked in the private sector, nonprofit sector and the federal government. I always took my professional life very seriously pushing myself to take on big challenges. I earned a graduate degree, several certifications and won countless awards. I’ve been surrounded by the world’s most affluent, powerful and influential people. When I finally got married, I thought surely this would be a good time to take a six-month break. After all, I deserved it. Within my six-month break, I got pregnant. My pregnancy came with every unwanted, uncomfortable feeling you could imagine. I lived in the bathroom, over the toilet for the first five months. Of course, I didn’t pursue a job because I physically could not handle it but I was tormented-- I couldn’t be the Fatimeh I always was. But when I finally gave birth to my first born, the rest was history. At least for a little bit… because our society structure strips us of our right to fully embrace pregnancy, birth and bonding.

After six months of spending the most beautiful, unforgettable moments with my son I decided to send my resume out to several companies. It’s not that I wanted to return to an office but that I needed that intellectual stimulation, plus I was terrified of the fact that I’ve been ‘gone for too long’. I even contacted a staffing agency for assistance. Nothing came through. How? My qualifications are remarkable. The staffing agency told me that the gap in my resume was the likely reason. I responded with, “I had a baby”. You wouldn’t believe what she told me… she said, “whenever you anticipate a gap in your resume you should return to school or pursue a certification or anything to shorten/eliminate the gap.” In my head I thought… oh ok, having a baby is not a good enough reason? I mean I just created a life.

I joined mommy groups both virtual and in-person and the majority of conversations between women referred to the fear of returning back to the workforce because they ‘have to’ for financial reasons or the fear of returning and being ‘rejected’ or already trying to get back in the game and having no success and its taking a toll on their marriage or health. What I learned very quickly is that I was not alone; this issue is causing so much grief for women across the board.

From this frustration, the concept of Modern Day Woman was born. After 3.5 years of deep thinking and research I decided to talk to my sisters to see if they wanted to solve this problem with me and add their invaluable knowledge and experience. They jumped on it. Do you know why? It’s not a hard sell. This is a serious issue and a critical pain-point affecting so many women facing different challenges.

I only referenced one challenge. But there are so many more. Women shoulder different responsibilities from men. We are naturally the nurturers. Our children come to us for comfort. We’re typically the ones to take on the responsibility of taking care of an elderly family member or a sick parent. Some of us suffer from mental disorders such as depression, post-partum depression or post-traumatic stress disorder. Others suffer from physical disabilities some that are visual to the eye and some that are internal and invisible.

How about those of us who have an extra load of responsibility because our spouse is serving the military, working odd and long hours or maybe you’re a single parent. How much more convenient would it be if you had the ability to work from home, earn just as much, have healthcare insurance and the ability to grow in your company? How much more productive would you be? Let’s not forget the women who are barely getting by and need to work multiple jobs to increase their income. Should they abandon their personal lives? Why can’t the second shift be from the comfort of her home?

Are we waiting for climate change to be the biggest reason to shift to virtual work in an effort to reduce our global imprint? Don’t get me wrong, climate change is immensely important. But do we not value our women enough to make this shift NOW? Not only will it benefit the woman but this has ripple effects on her children, her spouse, her finances, marriage, family dynamic, the larger economy, climate change AND the employer as their overhead could decrease if they strongly pursued this because they wouldn’t need such large buildings!

Well we’re here ladies. Modern Day Woman is so proud to be the first of its kind working diligently to compile vetted and legitimate virtual work opportunities on one easy platform. If you visit our website at www.moderndaywoman.com you will find hundreds of thousands of virtual/remote job opportunities as well as professional resources to help you succeed in the workforce.

We’re still engaging more companies to post their jobs on our website to help you and them increase their female representation. Follow us on social media and be sure to follow our blog for exciting updates. We will launch our resourceful and powerful webinars as well as our signature Modern Day Woman Veterans Program in January 2020.

Modern Day Woman is truly in the fight for increased professional accessibility through virtual job opportunities since women endure so many expected and unexpected challenges that prohibit us from participating in the traditional workplace.

We deserve the accessibility to such opportunities to sustain our health, families, children and financial independence. I deserve it, you deserve it, our daughters deserve it!

---Fatimeh Barrie

Founder and Executive Director 

2 Comments

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  1. Fatti88@aol.com'
    Megan 2 years ago

    It’s like you were speaking to my soul!
    Thank you for this 🙂

  2. F.bakhtyari@yahoo.com'
    Lindsey 2 years ago

    So relatable! In love with this whole idea.

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